Coming Out of Pain


It’s physical and emotional. Usually at the same time.

And especially at the beginning.

Depending on the cause of pain, the physical component can fade, but the emotional part can continue on for what seems like an eternity. 


It does not discriminate. It doesn’t care about timing. It comes in all forms like:

  1. Death – the loss of a loved one
  2. Break-ups – the end of a long term relationship, a marriage, or even a job
  3. Physical – broken bones, cuts and scrapes, illness (chronic or terminal) or allergies
  4. Emotional – depression, anxiety, anger
  5. Finances (or lack thereof)


It’s solitary, yet can cast a wide net and affect others around you.

While you can share how your pain feels to you, no one can literally feel the pain you are feeling in the way that you feel it. That doesn’t mean people can’t or don’t feel compassion though. At least for little while. 

But, pain can be isolating, especially when it hangs on. And when it hangs on, sometimes, there are people that don’t have the ability to stay in your life and weather the storm with you and watch while you try to navigate the bumpy road of getting back to life. Back to finding joy and happiness again.

During my season of pain I lost a few friends. Relationships I would have banked to stand the test of time, last forever, all that good stuff. 

That wasn’t the case, and it’s totally okay. 

I feel sadness that the relationships, dissolved, but I also understand at the same time that we are all built with different coping skills. Not everyone has the tolerance to watch people they care about fall apart and not be able to do anything about it, because the silly, little humans we are think we can actually fix people when they are broken and in the darkest of places.

And when we can’t fix the people we love, that helplessness creeps in and it’s a terrible feeling. Rather then feeling like a stoodge because we can’t fix something or someone, we disconnect and seek the butterflies and unicorns that bring joy in our lives so we don’t have to watch the sorrow and pain in someone else’s life.

During my journey of coming out of pain I have learned that forgiveness breaks the chains that keep you captive, love is the constant that heals and hope is always in front of me, even when I can’t see it.  I have been truly blessed to have some ridiculously amazing and supportive people in my life that just wouldn’t give up on me no matter how hard I tried to push them away.

If you are struggling today. If you are thinking of doing something that will be permanent. If you need someone to talk to. Please, reach out to me. Reach out to someone you trust. Lean on your faith and remember that the darkness is temporary. 

And most importantly, that you are loved ❤️

Until next time…

Love, Jeni


3 thoughts on “Coming Out of Pain

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