Living in fear…is the world as we know it coming to an end?


I am an inhabitant of a very small, very secluded bubble.  Inside my bubble I pretty much don’t know shit about movies (past or current), present day news (local or worldwide), celebrity goings on (with the exception of Charlie Sheen and his HIV status…oh, you didn’t know?) or what the current fashion trends are.  I mean, I barely have a handle on history for the love of Pete!  How in the world am I supposed to keep up?!?

Then, just five days ago…

Paris happened.

Let’s be clear here, I don’t have a soapbox.  No agenda, hidden or otherwise.  I’m not going to rant about politics, or our President talking about allowing Syrian refugees in to our country, or the fact that Police Officers in France don’t even carry guns (I mean really?!?).

Ok, calm down Jen (rubs ears and chants goose-fra-bah)…

Ahh!  That’s better!


This past Sunday at church we had a guest speaker, a Friar (a Catholic monk) who was there to talk about missionary work, but before he did, he spoke of the tragedy that had taken place in Paris just a couple of days earlier on Friday.

And he asked one simple question…

“Is the world coming to an end”?

The answer?

Yes, sort of.

At least…

As we have known it.

I realized then, that I have lived two very different lives during my forty-four years on this planet.  The first, lived without fear as a child, an adolescent and a young adult.  Where I could trust my neighbor or leave my car door unlocked.

Until September 11, 2001.

And since that day, I have lived in fear.  With distrust.  And skepticism.

It sucks.

It makes me sad.

It also makes me incredibly angry!

Oh shit…I said I wasn’t going to get on my soapbox.  Promised I didn’t have an agenda…I’ll stop before I get carried away.

What happened in Paris is bullshit.  What happened on 9/11 is bullshit.  What happened under Hitler is bullshit.  I could go on and on and on (if I knew Jack about history anyway)…

…but my point is this.

Fear is a sneaky little bitch.  It’s almost like having a drug addiction.  It comes in, takes over rational thought, clouds conscious decision making, and renders us stupid, which ultimately leads to poor choices and paranoid behavior.

I’m sad that random, large scale acts of hate and violence have crippled us as a world, a nation, and as a people.

That we live in a space of anger and distrust, whether we choose to acknowledge and/or admit it.

I’m sad that the world as I knew it, as a wide eyed and inquisitive child and young adult, no longer exists.

That when a complete stranger, whose foreign and clearly agitated, shoves his cell phone at me while I’m standing in the loading zone at Newark Liberty International Airport, four days after Paris was attacked, asking me to give someone directions to where he is, and the first thought that comes to my mind is not the Christian in me wanting to help this person, but rather, “is he handing me a bomb that will blow me and the hundreds of other people standing around me to oblivion”?


The answer is yes.

The world as we have known it has ended.

The real question then is…

…how do we learn to live in this new world?

Pray for Paris.  Pray for us all.

Until next time.

Love, Jeni ❤








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